From my perspective, my arms are too flabby, and so is my tummy area. The only part of my body that i'm proud of are my thighs, which are pretty slim. (With thigh gap to boot.)
But it's just not enough.
In fact, I once got so insecure about my body, I cried.
I go to a fashion school, where I learn how to make dress patterns and sew, and last year, I was asked to model for my seniors, as they have just completed their final exams and wanted to show off their creations.
I got really excited, but then to my dismay, all of the clothes did not fit, except for one, which was a bustier type that you can lace up from the back, and a stretchy tulle skirt. While another girl, who was nearly my age, was able to fit in everything she was handed. I felt so fat and disgusting, like a defected product as compared to her, and all I wanted to do was to run away and hide. Once I got in my car, I curled up in the backseat and just started sobbing to myself.
That was me after the show.. don't my arms look fat?
The above event was what lead me to start dieting, and fortunately, my weight has gone down 4 kilos :)
My weight back then was always 54 kg, but today, it sits on the 50-51 kg scale~
I took a break from dieting afterwards, since I felt confident with my weight.
This year 2012, I joined Tumblr, and I discovered Thinspiration.
Thanks to Tumblr's infinite scroll feature, I got to see a LOT of thinspo pictures..
I felt fat, and angry with myself again, but I was also filled up with determination, the determination to finally be as fit as the girls I saw on Tumblr.
Some of them have probably achieved their figure through an eating disorder, but I didn't want to go down that lane. Instead, I intend to lose my extra fat by cutting on calories, sugars, and also through exercising more. I want to LIVE skinny, not DIE skinny!
I started my diet last month, and yes, there are results.. my arms are smaller now, and i've lost some fats here and there, I've also developed some muscle ;)
but i'm nowhere close to ThinSpo figure, YET.
People think thinspiration is bad, because it causes young girls to succumb to eating disorders.
Well, I don't find myself puking out food I had minutes earlier, nor am I skipping meals. I want to lose weight properly and healthily, and not slowly kill myself, but I guess some girls just don't process the right messages..so no, I certainly do not support eating disorders.
If you want to lose weight, then go exercise for an hour every day, drink green tea, and cut down on sugars and stuff. Not eating would only cause the weight to come back after you start eating again, and no, you can't starve yourself forever.
Because by then you'd be dead.
And now i'm off to burn 500 calories at the gym, bye~ :)
